way too much that I haven't paid attention to my body. I eat and sleep a lot.
That time, I had a boyfriend who kind of accepted me for who I am. Though our relationship isn't really a romantic one, I was assured that I have a partner and that being fat is okay.
However, that relationship didn't last and when we broke up, that made me look at myself in disgust. Sometimes, I don't even want to see my own reflection in the mirror and try to look away whenever I see glasses at malls. I just can't look at my body.
I know I'm not ugly and I can still flaunt my facial features a little bit. But people shouldn't see the whole me so I started cropping my pictures on social media sites like Facebook to only show my face. I can't post the pictures I took directly to my Facebook because I don't want people to see how big I really was.
Then I go shopping and see cute dresses but they obviously won't fit. There had been times when I try to fit outfits that looked big to me and they still won't fit. I had a hard time accepting the fact that I have grown so big that even the dresses I find big were still small for me. So I had to shop online for XXL outfits and had them deliver those to my place - which of course costs more.
But above of it all, the world has been a little too cruel. Both online and real world. After my break up, I tried dating "online". But when I showed these guys the 'real' me, hoping for acceptance, they turn their backs away. Some of them weren't really nice and had to say "Lol, you're fat" and that's soul crushing right there. However, as much as I want to curse them to death, I know that that won't solve anything.
I want to lose some weight to look better and most importantly, for health issues. I often get sick because I can't move around so much. But there's another thing... I put the PRO in procrastination. I hate to exercise so much.
But I did it. I'm now down to 70kg. Still not that sexy but hey, 120kg to 70kg is some serious stuff right there. I will make another blog post as to how I did it and I'll link it after this one.
When I lost weight, those people I wished to give me a little attention came flocking on me. When I started displaying pictures showing more than my face, I get a lot of pms even ex's who were trying to hit on me again. More people wanting to become my friends and are now trying to get my attention. And these are the same people I tried to reach out to in the past.
I can't help but feel annoyed and dismayed. Even though there are real people who liked me when I was still fat, I can't deny the fact that there are idiots who will just go after your physical appearance. Nothing changed, really, as far as my personality and attitude is concerned.
Looking at the bright side, I now know who to keep and who to remove out of my life. And this transformation taught me a lot of things in life.
Am I gonna give up my love of food and cooking? No. But I realized that moderation is key. Anything in excess is a no no.
Lose Weight Without Exercise : http://can-d-light.blogspot.com/2015/01/losing-weight-without-exercise-gandara.html
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